Can Music save Cuba? That's what I've been seeing off the Time Magazines on display at any convenience shops. At the same time, can work save Hein? Well, it HAD save me from a lot of things. I have lost my passion for sleep. I remember waking up every morning with this happiness that I have experienced my most favorite activity of my lifetime, SLEEPING IN. Now, it's been a while and living on red bull had fucked my immune system and I seem to go on very well without sleep. I have also lost my willingness to try meeting new people off the net. Boy, I don't even have time for sex lately. Yes, that's another bad shit as well.. I seem to be drying up like an old piece of grass on a dog's freshly pooed poo. Fresh surroundings but dry and stuck in one place.. that's me. Now, if you call that being saved, I guess you're somebody who loves being on your own. lol....
Started from Friday I had work at 1pm til 5 then from 6 til 11pm. I came back home and I got too excited doing my Vblog and slept at 4am. The next Sat morning, I woke up at 8am and worked from 10 to 7 then from 7:30 til 11:30. Today I worked from 11 to 7 after once again going to bed pretty late (more like early at 4am) and waking up at 9am. So, for the whole weekend I had nine hours of sleep in three days. I know.. I"m so fucked.... And I consumed eight red bulls in three days and two mothers. God, now what have I become? Now, another question, why am I not as skinny as Christian Bale in the 'Machinist'.... look how much of an insomnia freak I've become and I think I've actually gained more weight.
My obsession for gym had also died due to me being broke. I've just been working hard to pay my debts back and to kinda regain a bit of stability. But the process just suck ass and I hate having to work but at the same time, I love having things to do too. I don't know.. it's too ironic for an explanation.
So, I've been thinking a lot about Aaron pretty much lately despite the fact that I have no time for boys lately. And I've been in touch with him pretty much. In the past few days, we've flirted, fought, shared a lot of things and kissed. Now..... that's a bit woh!!! Since I don't even know what to think of it at the moment.
My flatmate came to my room not long ago and told me she kinda was browsing through books in a book shop. She kinda unintentionally picked Dr Phil's book and he said 'your ideal soulmate' is someone who fits in 80% of what you want. He asked the reader to list down all the things he/she wants in his/her future soulmate, trying to be as generous as possible (i.e. not including any stupid things like body like Brad Pitt). So, I've thought of making one.
Let me go from head to toe for this.
* Head and Brain *
- Short hair is a must.
- Colored eyes are favored.
- Good kisser.
- Slender face.
- considerate person.
- mature in the head.
- optimism's a plus.
- must like the band "green day"
- prefer people who sings
- good dancer
- not feminine at all.
- same level as me.
Body
- not too thin, not too fat.
- toned but prefer a bit of manly flab and not just a blank six abs with no meat around the stoamach or waist.
- Good ass (that's stupid.. i'm not even a top)
- Broad shoulders
- Manly structure
- Taller
- NOT THAT HAIRY (such a hypocrite)
- Good thighs.
- Must play sports or do gym
* Personality *
- chilled and relaxed and should be able to laugh things off.
- must be good with humor and be able to bounce off things I say.
- must prioritize me ALL THE TIME.. well except for his family.. I want him to prioritize his family though.. cos family rocks... hmm.. ok dogs are acceptable too. he can prioritize his dog...
* Sense of style *
- Masculinity slash metro.
- Polos and loose jeans (HOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT)
- Love for perfume's a must
- must know how to dress at different functions.. like.. KNOW UR EVENT... I'd hate it if he turns up in a thong for an important function..
- Unique sense of style and not really a brandwhore..
I don't know... most of the thing sounds so superficial but I gotta admit.. I DO WANT someone I wanna value and look up to.... but at the same time, someone who I don't have to be scared of or be intimidated by... Am I being too harsh or is my list quite normal? I'm trying to be A Plus honest here..
Now back to aaron.... I don't know why but I like him but I gotta find if it's cos he likes me (as in I like him for my benefits) or cos I do like him... he's so cute but he totally leads this lifestyle or sense of style that doesn't really belong in my dictionary.... on a very superficial judgement that is... but his personality and warmth I treasure... so I don't know... I'm just enjoying time with him at the moment.. I just wish I could stop thinking he's a girly guy when he isn't but something keeps telling me that he's not someone I would've gone for in the past.. the whole package.... is just not Hein's style... but at the same time, why do I keep going back to him and why have I totally let go of le livre noir to actually spend time with him...... I'm just worried he's gonna be another gay guy with a feminine side.... that'll be quite ugly *sigh*.... at the moment, I do see an Aaron that is NOT like his pics at all.. I used to be scared of his pics cos they DO look bitchy and a bit feminine to be honest...
Hmm... I do wanna get to know him... he sounds like a good catch by the things he's told me... very impressed at the moment.
Oh, and yes I'm aware that he knows this blog... but I can't stop writing my mind at times. So, if you, who's reading is Aaron, do not think much about this post cos I'm just writing down my thoughts....:P
Started from Friday I had work at 1pm til 5 then from 6 til 11pm. I came back home and I got too excited doing my Vblog and slept at 4am. The next Sat morning, I woke up at 8am and worked from 10 to 7 then from 7:30 til 11:30. Today I worked from 11 to 7 after once again going to bed pretty late (more like early at 4am) and waking up at 9am. So, for the whole weekend I had nine hours of sleep in three days. I know.. I"m so fucked.... And I consumed eight red bulls in three days and two mothers. God, now what have I become? Now, another question, why am I not as skinny as Christian Bale in the 'Machinist'.... look how much of an insomnia freak I've become and I think I've actually gained more weight.
My obsession for gym had also died due to me being broke. I've just been working hard to pay my debts back and to kinda regain a bit of stability. But the process just suck ass and I hate having to work but at the same time, I love having things to do too. I don't know.. it's too ironic for an explanation.
So, I've been thinking a lot about Aaron pretty much lately despite the fact that I have no time for boys lately. And I've been in touch with him pretty much. In the past few days, we've flirted, fought, shared a lot of things and kissed. Now..... that's a bit woh!!! Since I don't even know what to think of it at the moment.
My flatmate came to my room not long ago and told me she kinda was browsing through books in a book shop. She kinda unintentionally picked Dr Phil's book and he said 'your ideal soulmate' is someone who fits in 80% of what you want. He asked the reader to list down all the things he/she wants in his/her future soulmate, trying to be as generous as possible (i.e. not including any stupid things like body like Brad Pitt). So, I've thought of making one.
Let me go from head to toe for this.
* Head and Brain *
- Short hair is a must.
- Colored eyes are favored.
- Good kisser.
- Slender face.
- considerate person.
- mature in the head.
- optimism's a plus.
- must like the band "green day"
- prefer people who sings
- good dancer
- not feminine at all.
- same level as me.
Body
- not too thin, not too fat.
- toned but prefer a bit of manly flab and not just a blank six abs with no meat around the stoamach or waist.
- Good ass (that's stupid.. i'm not even a top)
- Broad shoulders
- Manly structure
- Taller
- NOT THAT HAIRY (such a hypocrite)
- Good thighs.
- Must play sports or do gym
* Personality *
- chilled and relaxed and should be able to laugh things off.
- must be good with humor and be able to bounce off things I say.
- must prioritize me ALL THE TIME.. well except for his family.. I want him to prioritize his family though.. cos family rocks... hmm.. ok dogs are acceptable too. he can prioritize his dog...
* Sense of style *
- Masculinity slash metro.
- Polos and loose jeans (HOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT)
- Love for perfume's a must
- must know how to dress at different functions.. like.. KNOW UR EVENT... I'd hate it if he turns up in a thong for an important function..
- Unique sense of style and not really a brandwhore..
I don't know... most of the thing sounds so superficial but I gotta admit.. I DO WANT someone I wanna value and look up to.... but at the same time, someone who I don't have to be scared of or be intimidated by... Am I being too harsh or is my list quite normal? I'm trying to be A Plus honest here..
Now back to aaron.... I don't know why but I like him but I gotta find if it's cos he likes me (as in I like him for my benefits) or cos I do like him... he's so cute but he totally leads this lifestyle or sense of style that doesn't really belong in my dictionary.... on a very superficial judgement that is... but his personality and warmth I treasure... so I don't know... I'm just enjoying time with him at the moment.. I just wish I could stop thinking he's a girly guy when he isn't but something keeps telling me that he's not someone I would've gone for in the past.. the whole package.... is just not Hein's style... but at the same time, why do I keep going back to him and why have I totally let go of le livre noir to actually spend time with him...... I'm just worried he's gonna be another gay guy with a feminine side.... that'll be quite ugly *sigh*.... at the moment, I do see an Aaron that is NOT like his pics at all.. I used to be scared of his pics cos they DO look bitchy and a bit feminine to be honest...
Hmm... I do wanna get to know him... he sounds like a good catch by the things he's told me... very impressed at the moment.
Oh, and yes I'm aware that he knows this blog... but I can't stop writing my mind at times. So, if you, who's reading is Aaron, do not think much about this post cos I'm just writing down my thoughts....:P
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