362 days I have left to try to get to be with BooMan. I gave myself this hope that I will meet him this year. I don’t care how or when or where. I just have to meet him. Do you know the feeling of seeing your boyfriend you can’t touch on vzo chat screen smiling at you while he’s intoxicated and all you could do is give him the weakest grin, which he finds cute, and a promise that you would do anything to make him feel good? Deep inside, you’re exploding with the fact that you can’t give him a hug or pat his head while you’re lying close to him in bed and the last thing you could do is give him a kiss virtually and hope he sleeps ok. I’m totally sick and tired of not being close to the person I love and I don’t know what hurts me more:- not being near him or the feeling of not knowing what’s going on in his life.
17 days until I can drink again. I know I’m being a hypocrite here but I could really use bottles and bottles of wine to numb everything around me. Drugs make me sleepy, cigarettes fuck my voice up but drinking.. at least I could just indulge in the tipsy moment to just put a fast forward button in my life.
12 more days until I get a break from work for two weeks, which will end up in consecutive days of making music videos, choreographing and going to interviews. Today, I went to SGH supermarket with KC to buy some dance DVDs to think of dance moves. It was cute to see how KC and his son enters a toy shop and it ended up with KC asking his son to get what HE actually wants. Well, his son ended up taking Magatron instead of Bumblebee anyways while KC wants BumbleeBee. Ok, back to my music plan. I have an interview this Thursday and I’m kinda nervous about it since I do not know what questions they would end up asking.
12 more days to finish my website at work. Now that I got the codes working, it’s time to work on the whole website itself. Drawing myself a work plan would be the most useful thing to do at the moment.
3 more hours until I sleep to get myself to dream of good things to come while waiting for tomorrow to pass me by.
I’m tired. I’m exhausted. I’m nervous. But I’m still counting….
17 days until I can drink again. I know I’m being a hypocrite here but I could really use bottles and bottles of wine to numb everything around me. Drugs make me sleepy, cigarettes fuck my voice up but drinking.. at least I could just indulge in the tipsy moment to just put a fast forward button in my life.
12 more days until I get a break from work for two weeks, which will end up in consecutive days of making music videos, choreographing and going to interviews. Today, I went to SGH supermarket with KC to buy some dance DVDs to think of dance moves. It was cute to see how KC and his son enters a toy shop and it ended up with KC asking his son to get what HE actually wants. Well, his son ended up taking Magatron instead of Bumblebee anyways while KC wants BumbleeBee. Ok, back to my music plan. I have an interview this Thursday and I’m kinda nervous about it since I do not know what questions they would end up asking.
12 more days to finish my website at work. Now that I got the codes working, it’s time to work on the whole website itself. Drawing myself a work plan would be the most useful thing to do at the moment.
3 more hours until I sleep to get myself to dream of good things to come while waiting for tomorrow to pass me by.
I’m tired. I’m exhausted. I’m nervous. But I’m still counting….
Listening to: Jason Mraz – Sleep all day
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