Laugh At Life

I guess time to myself ain't that bad after all. I've been sick since Saturday. I actually blame it on late nights and alcohol consumption but god, I'm glad to be doing a dry July with Craig. It's about time I get healthy and actually be cool sober. I kinda miss being cool sober. I've been depending myself too much on the tipsiness. But I guess my kidneys would just burst out on its own, leaving me no choice but to die with them, if I don't watch my drinking. I know I'm gonna regret saying this but when Craig said 'baby is like boo in drinking', I kinda thought it was hot. Partners in crime. Bonnie and Clyde!! Ah well, I wouldn't want to leave Craig with my kidney failure as yet so health is yet another option to simmer down and focus on at the moment.

I actually wrote a letter/email to Craig today. I guess we've come to this point where we chat almost all the time and 70% of our messages are just covered with "I love you" and this and that. I guess writing him an email at night kinda rocks too, given he gets to see me when I'm deep in thoughts and just calm. I don't really expect much of getting to Sydney earlier (only cos it hurts) but I've been told a lot on it. My grand-dad has been going on and on about how I'm getting sick and it means something good is about to happen. My grand-dad is not really a superstitious person but when it comes to things like that, he totally goes wild on that topic (the whole bad shit happen for good shit to prevail soon) and I guess I serve a good grandson post by believing in the same. But lately, I've been quite down with the whole expectations of getting to Sydney soon though. It doesn't mean I'm giving up but I guess I'm a bit tired of thinking about it. I've done it for a year now and how good of a waiter can you be?

I've begun to giggle at life. MamaMills (my boss in sydney) was right. Coming to sydney will NOT solve any problems. It's true I'll be in the arms of someone I love and someone who loves me. It's true I'll get my life back. But god, I've managed to cloud out the possible dramas that's waiting to lurk out. Like my mom and sis. God, I'd have to the Gilbert Grape for this and this is something I'd wanna do. I mean, I've never spent enough time with my mom before and I guess it's just about time she's happy to be in the same capital/state with me. I guess once I get to Sydney, I'd be faced with my worst enemy.... financial dealing. I mean, my sis's work expire next June. How would I ever make it happen for both of them to come join me and given I would NOT want them to stay with me and Criag, but in another home, which I might have to chuck a mortgage. That's what I mean by giggling. Sometimes you just have to laugh at what life gives you. Full of dramas with every good shit along the way. I guess it's a bit of a challenge for me though. I'd hate to not fight while I'm alive. I guess, given I've been through a lot for my level, I should just soldier on and treat one drama as a package to learn more things.

Oh dear life... never run of things to learn, huh??? I guess, for the time being, I'm just gonna chillax and take one day at a time and start planning out once I'm done with this Periodic Review IV project and my album. I guess I was born to run... walking makes you have bad postures anyways.. hahaha