Three Hours with Linc... and Nutella

Three hours with Lincoln for our first ever nutella date. He was broke and I didn't wanna spend much and be all 'look at me I can afford shit'. So we decided to go to Hyde Park and just have nutella. After around two hours, push came to shove and yes I did have my first kiss with him. It was pretty hot kissing him since he smoked before we did. I think I have a little obsession with kissing smokers now. I've quit smoking but now I think I'll be addicted to kissing smokers.

Before all of this, I went and FINALLY met Gianni, whose name apparently is actually pronounced like Yanni, the music composer. I asked him how he was going with his boy or man. You see... me and Gianni have been flirting each other a bit though he's from Greece and one day outta the blue, he told me not to expect anything since he's found this Greek guy in Sydney who'll have him over and bla bla bla.. Well, this was my reaction..

1. First of all, I didn't expect anything especially when chatting to someone who's in Greece.
2. It pisses me off since his tone was kinda like "i'm sorry this greek man's better".
3. I piss myself off since I thought I shouldn't be pissed off over this at all...

So, I was kinda semi glad when he told me he wasn't working well with this Greek man and that the Greek man doesn't know about him meeting me today or else he'll get jealous. I told him it's not as if I was gonna jump on him or anything and I told him to not to tell his Greek man since I don't really want trouble out of nothing wrong I did.. but deep inside, I was kinda glad they didn't work out. But, do I want Gianni at the moment? Nope. He's had his chances.... it's gone.. but still, we're friends.. so it's not all bad

Now, back to my nutella date, I don't know.. I felt so comfortable with this thing we did in the park. It's not everyday that someone wants to get cozy in a park. We were just two boys, wrestling on the ground and making out in the middle of our nutella fest. I like the fact that I didn't really expect anything from this but at the same time, I was just content with it. Deep inside, I actually want him to want me and miss me.... and by that, I mean I want him to roam around Sydney and finally find out if he really likes me. I'm glad we're not expecting anything from this kiss but at the same time, the moment was just indescribable. I think it was putting my new attitude to the test. Lately, I've been feeling like I can DO without being owned by someone and just being appreciated by someone. To the point where if he finds someone new apart from me, it'll just mean that we're not meant for each other and he'll miss out on me but then again, he'll be happy with the other guy. I don't know.. I'm so not hoping anything for a change.. which is weird. Normally, I'd be so addicted right now messaging him and stuff. But I"m just glad I'm back in my little room of heinness and the new Gossip Girl episode's gonna be out tonight anyways. So, yeah... nothing can make me sad at this point... If I see him again, it'll be bonus.. If I don't, I'll still have nutella and watch Gossip Girl.. If he wants something outta it, we'll have to compromise...

cos come to think of it.. do I really need a relationship? :D

FYI, the inset pic is of me and gianni.. I don't feel like scaring Linc yet with my camera habit.

Music: Britney Spears - If You Seek Amy

Mood: nutellaed