The Epitome of Fuckism

The existence of gay men at work always excites me, given, I thought, for once I could actually get to meet new gay people through work as opposed to night clubs or a website. So, there are three altogether that I know of, excluding Paperbag cos we can talk about him 'later'. We got the Earring guy, who I thought looks ok but he gets a bit nervous and all weird (I think he's either Australian or English), LeBitch, the guy from 8th floor who's as feminine as any bitch could be though he's really nice to me and Leprechaun, a friend of St Patrick's who's actually LeBitch's boyfriend.

So, recapping.. we got LeBitch, Leprechaun (to make things easier, you got two guys whose nicks start with "Le" who are actually a couple) and Earring.

One of the nights that I had beer with St Patrick, I saw LeBitch and Earring having beer. I just thought to myself it was one of those casual work meeting. Maybe it was.. who cares? So, yesterday we had a classical concert where most of our workpeople were there, either for the music or their social lives boost?

I enjoyed it thoroughly given I sat with exboss and St Patrick, had some good beer, heard some good shit music with this German dude on Cello and this fine young lady on piano, had some boys giggling at me from the other side (I swear I heard my name mentioned) and of course a good time away from home.

It was during intermission when I saw LeBitch and Earring having their little whispery conversation. I didn't mean to eavesdrop but I heard Earring said "thought you were trying to make this discreet". Now, to make this story clearer, Leprechaun just got back from wherever he went to yesterday. So, while he was gone, LeBitch might've slept with Earring. So I assumed.

Later, I had one of those talks with exboss cos she's just so good to talk those crappy lovey things with. I told her I might be wrong but I heard this and I'm so sick of it. She said 'yeah, they're in an open relationship'.

I was right..... even the gaymen in a humanitarian group doesn't really support monogamy. Let alone monogamy can't they for once just NOT HAVE SEX? lol It's funny cos I haven't had sex for four months and I feel fine, thanx to porno products and my beloved two hands (trust me, these days I've become left handed as well). I mean, how desperate can one get? So, the question arises.

Am I the only gay man who believes in monogamy and true love????

Am I wrong to believe that open relationship is bad????

Am I gonna end up in a rocking chair if I am not able to negotiate for an open relationship with a guy I love?

Now, St Patrick cheered me up by saying they're the ones who are gonna end up in rocking chairs and he told me to not give up because this is the reason why 'that someone' you will in the future special. Come to think of it.. it's true.. Why would I find someone so special if I never spend so much energy or time looking for him/her? God, I feel good..

This whole concept was seconded today by no one other than Red. He came on facebook and this was roughly how the conversation went.

Red: I'm bored. I miss Sedona.

BAMMMM.. like why on earth would someone miss this place where someone trash talked about him behind his back, every waiters know you, the music is crap, the band sucks and the only thing you're good at is a dart game and Billy Ray Cyrus Dance? I mean, it even took me two months to actually convert myself to a hermit from a Sedona pimp.

Red: Any plans tonight?

Huh? Which part of "I am tired" that came from my mouth did not he understand? I mean, why would you try SO HARD to allure someone to hang out with you given he has given up on you for your stupidity and confusion about the whole gender appreciation thing. To make things worse, I made it quite clear that I deserve someone better. Now, when someone lusts over something just for the relationship of it and got to know him for a month and not wanna talk to him anymore, WHY WOULD U BOTHER? It even took me two years to get over my ex. People like Red would just drift and disappear.

Red: I'm so bored..

So fucking what?

Red: I haven't been doing anything..

Bla bla bla

Red: but masturb..

Don't know how to spell???

Red: I think you're busy.

DUH!!

Red: Bye!

Seriously, after reading that I laughed, then felt sorry for the guy and then felt so agitated such type of form exists. I am not even gonna say 'human being'. So is he trying to tease me? First of all, I lusted over him cos I did like him and when I like someone, it turns me on. For someone who says "You give better blowjob than *insert Designer's real name*", seriously, why the fuck would I hurt myself all over for you? I got other guys...

1. who actually KNOW they like guys.
2. who actually KNOW they're bi's but would stay true to whoever they're with.
3. who actually HAS A GOOD BODY to keep teasing me.
4. who actually speaks a better conversation that bounces as opposed to cute incorrect Burmese pronunciations...

I am not saying I'm strong cos if someone hot said the following things he had said, I would've chucked an uncontrollable boner. Had it been someone so hot and sexy, I would've gone bonkers. But seriously, dude.... fuck off.

On the other hand, I went to this data inputting company today and it's nice to know that the people there actually knows me 'as a singer' and it's better that I've chucked a good 'social status' with them cos I could use them for publicity and other shit.

St Patrick has been more supportive than ever. He saw my CV and mentioned how crap it was and that he would not have given me the job if it was him who got my CV. He had also mentioned that he would help me out with my CV.

I feel both good and bad.

Good. cos it's nice to know someone you really love as a brother takes care of you.

Bad. cos he's leaving soon..

Fuck work sometimes!!!he has