Not A Xmas Boy

So, call it luck or whatever but it seems like I get more intimate only with people from far away. I don't know what's been happening to me but CDG has been totally close to me and now I've got 31. Yes, he's 31, which makes him only three years older than me. Pathetically I met him through AYI, but after two chats, he started saying 'I like you a lot'. Now, I know how cheesy it sounds, yet cheesier to feel affected by it. But, there's something about his honesty and courage that kinda got my attention. I don't know.. it kinda makes me wonder also if I'm more attracted in a 'dating website' way. You know, how they always seem to be so much better online but sucks like total retard as soon as they meet up in reality. Well, I'm loud and there's no way I could qualify as an introvert.

So, work has been CRAZY. I'm at work now at 7:20pm on a Saturday. I'm so sure our workgroup would be the ace provider for the long living life of post-its since I've been using so much of them I keep needing more everytime I finish off a pack. It's almost like me and cigarettes when I was like 20. To be honest, I do love work. Work makes me happy and work keeps me busy. And when I don't work, I work on my songs and now that I got myself involved in some freelance translating part time job, I'm gonna be worked out. At the same time, it's being busy and getting money at the same time.

I saw this christmas film last night and as any christmas flicks would go, it all ended up warm and fuzzy. That kinda made me a bit sad. Cos back in Sydney, I never got to celebrate xmas with my loved ones. Even my best friend Ali is busy with her parents. So was Jen, my other best friend and of course Alex, with their Jewish family. And even Zhe's got his priorities set. So I would end up getting drunk in Stonewall.

It came to a point that last xmas, I was drunk at Stonewall that the security guard had to wake me up and asked me to leave. It was even funnier when my fuckbuddy, Nick, came by and joked that he's slept with a Burmese guy before. I didn't recall this but he told me back the next day. Apparently, I asked him how it was. He was like 'it was good' and I said 'he must be pretty good in bed' or somewhere along that line. I didn't remember ANY OF this. Then, I went out of stonewall and I was followed by this British accented guy. We talked. He was like "I didn't know why they kicked you out." and I said "me neither". Then we ended up going into pleasure chest, me not knowing where the fuck we were and he not knowing where the fuck I was leading him to. I went to one of the rooms, slid two dollars in and the porn got on. We started making out, then he got down on me and I kinda crept down only to realize that we have chosen the room at the end of the pleasure chest, which was a glory holed room. I only found that out while I was sliding down to kiss him while he was going down on me. I felt a hole with my right hand and when we peeped out, there were people lining up. We went off, laughed and the next morning, I ended up with a ten digits for his number instead of nine. FML!!!

So, that was my xmas last year. I've always wanted a family dinner for xmas. No matter how much I don't wanna be around my grandparents much, I love family dinners. Ah well, given mom and sis are not around, my xmas this year's gonna suck ass!!! Hmm.. life's a bit tough lately!!